"When there is doubt . . .
. . . look to the obvious"
Mastodon, the best band in the world, has a lyric, “When there is doubt, look to the obvious.” It is from one of my favorite songs, Tread Lightly, the epic opener to the album, Once More Round the Sun. What is the obvious? If you have been reading or watching me on YouTube lately it is LOVE.
For some reason this has clicked for me and I have been on a journey from one camp where they say, “Love is a myth and we live in a real world, with bad people so grow up” to “love is the only solution in a real world such as ours.” I am traversing a divide between Love as a cliche and naive slogan to it being the only answer and wrapped in efficacy.
I came to this conclusion in a number of ways but one was looking at the alternative. Hate. I have experiential data, testimony, where hate has made my life worse. I have realized that anything I have done where Hate was my fuel, has led to stress, cortisol, poison, unsustainable solutions, sickness, and a spreading of discomfort among those I cherish most. At the same time, all that I have done when fueled by Love, has led to health and vitality, a contagious glow enriching myself and others.
So the question then becomes, how can I feel love when something makes me want to hate. Recently I shared a thought about how life is a series of sticks thrown at you and you can either choose the optimistic side or the negative side (or love and hate). I can use two recent examples of this in my own life as I am on a journey and have not mastered anything yet.
I am going to renege on a promise I made in 2026, to not talk about politics, in order to take a look at Pam Bondi’s testimony before Congress yesterday. The hate monster in me came out listening to this because I felt, of all the things in the world to agree on, can’t we agree that America can’t let this slide. My hate was swelling up for Pam Bondi in ways where I could almost see it. My skin was on fire as I watched her deflect questions. Instead of answering directly, to help America understand that, of all the things we need cannot become numb to, it is pedophilia. For the love of God, this is not the time to deflect every question by attacking the one asking. She had a binder that had every hateful talking point for every representative on that panel. What a squandered opportunity for humility in the face of true evil!
I was shown a “stick” while watching Pam Bondi testify. I chose hate and despair that it has all come to this, of all things that should be black and white. After a good night’s rest, I am re-engaging this stick. It is still there. I can revisit and I can choose differently. This morning, I choose to look at all of this differently.
(Figure 1. Tread Lightly by Mastodon with Lyrics)
Really this has shown me that everything I hate about politics, may actually have a reckoning. Outside, of twitter and most social media, the country actually seems to be coming together on this. We won’t stand for it. It is a bridge too far, even for Trump. His approval ratings are plummeting. It is a grand disclosure of the evils of the elite where Right and Left have little to do with it. It shatters the illusion of a one tiered justice system, and there seem to be actual consequences incoming. All to say, the positive side of the stick here, the side I am choosing to grab and adopt, is that all of this ugliness, darkness, sickness, unchecked depravity is coming out into the light. The world has a chance to sanitize this insanity and demand more of our governing bodies.
“It’s all dirty man.” The response of a man I interviewed that was all-in on Q-Anon. I challenged him about alleged Republican bad behavior and that was his response. That always stuck with me. It’s all dirty, and now the populace seems to be waking up to this and have a chance to demand more! In my view, America will now crave more transparency when they listen to candidates who seek their votes. “How can YOU, Mrs./Mr. Candidate assure me, that you can be different and how will you prove it? Because we need proof now.” The positive end of the stick is that evil is being exposed and it is getting harder to hide it, while the demands and the standards the populace has of their government is getting refined. That is a great direction to be headed in.
I have to choose that end of the stick. That end has vitality, health, light and contagious love in it. The other end accelerates the decomposition of my body and mental health! EVEN IF IT CAN BE CONSIDERED TRUTH.
The other example is hearing the news that my company lost the re-compete for the project I was on. This means that I either have to find a new project within the company, or find a new job all together. This is my second example of a stick that I have been presented and much more personal. On one end of the stick is a rabbit hole of pity and hate towards those who made this decision. Honestly, there has been some of that, but despite this stick being much more personal, I am leaning more towards the positive. What a great opportunity to explore what else is out there! Not only that, this could actually have bene an answered prayer as I was already looking for something else since I was pretty unhappy where I was anyway. I have concerns for my team and for myself; I want us all to land on our feet, but maybe this is the push for many of us seeking bigger and better and more fulfilling opportunities. That is the end of the stick I have to choose. That is the end of the stick that has vitality, excitement, health, joy, adventure . . . and the end that will most likely lead to a positive outcome. Again, what is the alternative, fear and hate? I know those outcomes already.
Love feels hard when confronting experiences like I have shared above, but is actually quite practical. It’s selfish even . . . or maybe let’s say it is in the spirit of self preservation. Love is healthy and full of vitality. It is always a choice. I am working on it being the obvious choice.


Like the way you're thinking, Jesse. Bad Bunny is on to you, too. "The only thing more powerful than hate is love."