Really strong thought leadership here — this one stuck with me.
One thing I keep circling back to is the idea of opposites. I don’t actually see love and hate as opposites. To me, the real opposite of both is indifference — a complete lack of feeling, concern, or care. What often gets labeled as “hate” feels more like disengagement than active hostility.
That framing makes me wonder whether love is something we can reliably produce on our own. I’m pretty pessimistic about human nature in that regard. Left to ourselves, I think we’re far better at self-interest than self-giving.
Hospitality, though, feels different. It’s within reach. It can be practiced, even manufactured, for the good of others — regardless of how we feel in the moment. It doesn’t deny the reality of evil or pretend alignment fixes everything, but it does resist indifference.
Genuine question / challenge for you: if this post were written through that lens — indifference vs hospitality rather than love vs hate — what would change, if anything?
A lot to think through here. Can I share something trippy? Let me caveat by saying thi is kind of wild and personally, I do not know what to believe. Some of these out of body experience experts claim that when humans experience things on earth, it yields a substance that we can't see. Some even say, that is our purpose for being here, is to experience in such a way in that what we learn is harvested on the other side, and it informs the expansion of consciousness. They then share that Love and Hate yield the same substance but that Love is much more valuable and refined while Hate is crude. (Think difference between Oil from the ground and refined gasoline as an analogy). So in that sense, maybe the only difference between love and hate as an eternal experience is refinement. This perspective would also speak to indifference. To them, indifference would NOT produce anything. We could even tie this into the Bible; where we are warned that "luke warm" would be spit from God's mouth. So does God prefer Hate to indifference? In that framework, hate me be valuable because at least we are feeling something, and it is experiential at least! For me, I say screw that though. I don;t want to feel hate. To feel hate makes me stressed, it ups my cortisol, it contributes to being ill. Love, on the other hand, is vitality, passion and healing.
In regards to hospitality, that could be a "baby step" to love. But for me, I am tired of pretending I am for or against something, or supporting something because it is the right thing to do. Hospitality, to me, sounds excruciating without love. I think my purpose on earth is to get MYSELF into alignment so that the love pours from me and hospitality comes naturally. The love will overwhelm me and guide me into causes and pursuits I am passionate about. It is not always natural or easy to get aligned, and CLEARLY not for many people! But there are proven steps that I am learning for myself and it has become quite worthy. Meditation on that which makes me grateful, pursuing my bliss whether things like guitar, or embroidery. These things get me to alignment or pretty close . . . or let's say close enough to be dangerous :).
I love that your response took a hard left into astral oil refining and somehow landed back in gratitude journaling and embroidery. Respect.
I’m still hung up on the idea that hate is “valuable” because it produces something. That feels like arguing that screaming into traffic is better than silence because at least sound waves were created.
This is fascinating… but if hate and love both produce cosmic substance, I’m picturing the afterlife with an “Energy Harvest” dashboard and a very tired angel saying, “Sir, this is mostly rage. Again.” That's my heart of darkness ...
I get the alignment goal though — I just don’t trust myself (or humanity) to stay aligned long enough for love to reliably pour out. Hospitality feels like the guardrail when the alignment tank runs dry. I’ll concede hospitality might be a baby step to love — but sometimes baby steps are the only thing keeping us from face-planting while we wait to feel aligned.
Well, from my view, hate is detrimental to us, even if valuable to some degree by the supposed harvesters on the other side lol. I was merely sharing their thoughts on it in response to your question about whether hate is better than indifference. Down here from my view, hate begets hate and multiplies it and not seeing much use for it and worry about its expansion. For me, love and alignment is the only worthy pursuit, even if challenging or unrealistic for some. Maybe they won’t get it this round, and maybe they will when they get reincarnated . . . if reincarnation is a thing. I feel like I get it and now have a responsibility to pursue it and share what that journey is through testimony. I do NOT feel responsible for convincing others. I only feel like I need to do it, share my experience, and let the chips fall for others. I suspect some will resonate with what I am trying to do and it could be helpful, but maybe not many.
Great question! My inclination is to say “no”. In fact, I think some may mask their self loathing in being overly charitable! Raised an interesting point, even charity, if fueled by self loathing (hate), gets lost and sabotaged. For me, I had to love myself to get to where I am today (wherever that is). I was definitely imprisoned in guilt and shame, informed by my own fear, uncertainty and doubt I used to exacerbate, what I thought the church was telling me. Thinking we are not good enough when really the message is about being okay with where we are right now and that this is a journey that has direction but not a clear ending. Maybe? Great question.
Really strong thought leadership here — this one stuck with me.
One thing I keep circling back to is the idea of opposites. I don’t actually see love and hate as opposites. To me, the real opposite of both is indifference — a complete lack of feeling, concern, or care. What often gets labeled as “hate” feels more like disengagement than active hostility.
That framing makes me wonder whether love is something we can reliably produce on our own. I’m pretty pessimistic about human nature in that regard. Left to ourselves, I think we’re far better at self-interest than self-giving.
Hospitality, though, feels different. It’s within reach. It can be practiced, even manufactured, for the good of others — regardless of how we feel in the moment. It doesn’t deny the reality of evil or pretend alignment fixes everything, but it does resist indifference.
Genuine question / challenge for you: if this post were written through that lens — indifference vs hospitality rather than love vs hate — what would change, if anything?
A lot to think through here. Can I share something trippy? Let me caveat by saying thi is kind of wild and personally, I do not know what to believe. Some of these out of body experience experts claim that when humans experience things on earth, it yields a substance that we can't see. Some even say, that is our purpose for being here, is to experience in such a way in that what we learn is harvested on the other side, and it informs the expansion of consciousness. They then share that Love and Hate yield the same substance but that Love is much more valuable and refined while Hate is crude. (Think difference between Oil from the ground and refined gasoline as an analogy). So in that sense, maybe the only difference between love and hate as an eternal experience is refinement. This perspective would also speak to indifference. To them, indifference would NOT produce anything. We could even tie this into the Bible; where we are warned that "luke warm" would be spit from God's mouth. So does God prefer Hate to indifference? In that framework, hate me be valuable because at least we are feeling something, and it is experiential at least! For me, I say screw that though. I don;t want to feel hate. To feel hate makes me stressed, it ups my cortisol, it contributes to being ill. Love, on the other hand, is vitality, passion and healing.
In regards to hospitality, that could be a "baby step" to love. But for me, I am tired of pretending I am for or against something, or supporting something because it is the right thing to do. Hospitality, to me, sounds excruciating without love. I think my purpose on earth is to get MYSELF into alignment so that the love pours from me and hospitality comes naturally. The love will overwhelm me and guide me into causes and pursuits I am passionate about. It is not always natural or easy to get aligned, and CLEARLY not for many people! But there are proven steps that I am learning for myself and it has become quite worthy. Meditation on that which makes me grateful, pursuing my bliss whether things like guitar, or embroidery. These things get me to alignment or pretty close . . . or let's say close enough to be dangerous :).
I love that your response took a hard left into astral oil refining and somehow landed back in gratitude journaling and embroidery. Respect.
I’m still hung up on the idea that hate is “valuable” because it produces something. That feels like arguing that screaming into traffic is better than silence because at least sound waves were created.
This is fascinating… but if hate and love both produce cosmic substance, I’m picturing the afterlife with an “Energy Harvest” dashboard and a very tired angel saying, “Sir, this is mostly rage. Again.” That's my heart of darkness ...
I get the alignment goal though — I just don’t trust myself (or humanity) to stay aligned long enough for love to reliably pour out. Hospitality feels like the guardrail when the alignment tank runs dry. I’ll concede hospitality might be a baby step to love — but sometimes baby steps are the only thing keeping us from face-planting while we wait to feel aligned.
Well, from my view, hate is detrimental to us, even if valuable to some degree by the supposed harvesters on the other side lol. I was merely sharing their thoughts on it in response to your question about whether hate is better than indifference. Down here from my view, hate begets hate and multiplies it and not seeing much use for it and worry about its expansion. For me, love and alignment is the only worthy pursuit, even if challenging or unrealistic for some. Maybe they won’t get it this round, and maybe they will when they get reincarnated . . . if reincarnation is a thing. I feel like I get it and now have a responsibility to pursue it and share what that journey is through testimony. I do NOT feel responsible for convincing others. I only feel like I need to do it, share my experience, and let the chips fall for others. I suspect some will resonate with what I am trying to do and it could be helpful, but maybe not many.
Well expressed, Jesse. Here's a question: Do you think it's possible to love others if one doesn't love him/herself?
Great question! My inclination is to say “no”. In fact, I think some may mask their self loathing in being overly charitable! Raised an interesting point, even charity, if fueled by self loathing (hate), gets lost and sabotaged. For me, I had to love myself to get to where I am today (wherever that is). I was definitely imprisoned in guilt and shame, informed by my own fear, uncertainty and doubt I used to exacerbate, what I thought the church was telling me. Thinking we are not good enough when really the message is about being okay with where we are right now and that this is a journey that has direction but not a clear ending. Maybe? Great question.